Tuesday, 15 May 2012

My Palm Springs back and forth

  • Submitted by: Russell who was walking in Palm Springs, US
  • Russell says "I was lying in the sweltering desert sun, ordering another cocktail and playing on my phone's proximity-dating application when it slapped me in the face; I didn't have any recent cock pics! I immediately became erect and perambulated myself for five minutes until I was steaming hot, coated in sweat and ready to lie down again. I recorded all of the back and forth shuffling on my phone. Enjoy."

Monday, 12 March 2012

Lower Wacker

  • Submitted by: Russell who was walking in Chicago, US
  • Russell says "I was staying in a hotel on a road called Lower Wacker - this is probably what got me thinking about a cockwalk. It was about freezing outside and by the end of it I couldn't feel my fingers and had suffered for my art. The bumpy penile wart on the underside of this cock was due to my being compelled to go on the roller coaster simulator (perhaps to warm up) - those things are quite frightening when you're the only one inside them and after you've had 2 large cups of coffee."

Monday, 8 August 2011

Penistone Penis

  • Submitted by: John Jordan who was cycling in Barnsley, UK
  • John says "I figured due to the name of the [Penistone] road, our email may have been filtered. " - it wasn't, John - but it did take 3 months to get your cock up. Sorry the wait was so lengthy, I promise it won't be next time! Keep riding cocks for us.

Up and Down Cock

  • Submitted by: Russell who was cycling in San Francisco, US
  • Russell says "I haven't done any cock quite in a while and I'd just cycled 150 miles the day before so I decided it would be a good idea to head out to a place where I could ride up and down the smooth edges of a nice lengthy cock. No better place than San Francisco to find a good smooth ride that'll throw you up and down like a well-lubricated pumpjack. En route, I passed Colon Avenue which made me giggle."

Sunday, 12 September 2010

Morning cock

  • Submitted by: Russell who was walking in London, UK
  • Russell says "A trip to the hospital is never more brightened up than when it becomes an integral part of drawing a cock on the landscape. This might be my last cock in London though.. Look out America! I'm going to be looking out for cocks everywhere I go. :)"

Tuesday, 16 March 2010

Riding cock

  • Submitted by: Russell who was cycling in London, UK

  • Cock in context: at Google Maps

  • Russell says "Cycling from work to a friend and back again in the morning, I found it hard to concentrate on the road as I was distracted by looking down at my semi-developed cock.. Saddened by the small coin purse but pleased with my cock's rapid development, by the end of the journey my cock had become fully developed and I began the final spurt. I began to create some ejaculate whilst walking my bike through the park behind the houses of parliament and brushing past Covent Garden. I came very quickly to find myself back at work. The issues I have about my second cock are that, although much bigger than most of my walking cocks, it is rather short & stumpy and my coin purse is very tight and a little irregular/warty. I also appear to be ejaculating from a slightly higher point than expected.. Ho hum. Will plan more next time I try to 'ride a cock'."

The money shot

  • Submitted by: Russell who was strombling in London, UK

  • Cock in context: at Google Maps

  • Russell says "Not much to say about this one. Was taking a walk in posh old Mayfair (Money shot - get it?) and realised I was once again half way to potential greatness with half a penis. If most of my international emails are correct, I oft feel this way. So, as ever, I quickly make swift movements around top of the shaft, approaching climax by shuffling around the balls and quickly bringing closure by pushing into the perineum. After building up quite a sweat, the real climax came from reliving the journey I had fully documented on my phone. Arf arf. Enjoy."

The penis, mightier than the sword

  • Submitted by: Russell who was sailing and walking in London, UK

  • Cock in context: at Google Maps

  • Russell says: "The title of this post has nothing to do with my wet cock (pictured), I just thought of it and thought it made a nice title.. We had to get a boat without too many stops to make the underside of this one less warty than it might have otherwise been. Possibly noteworthy (as it provided titillation en route), we passed through Bell Lane, Cobb Street, Wood Street and Cock Lane, and also passed 'Dirty Dicks' and 'Bung Hole' public houses. Teehee. I hope you appreciate the length I went to and the length I walked to create the length of my biggest cock ever. Enjoy."

Wednesday, 28 October 2009

Russell's first cock

  • Submitted by: Russell who was walking to work in London, UK

  • Cock in context: at Google Maps

  • Russell says: As you will see, my coin purse gently nestling against the chin of leicester square, the veiny length of the shaft running along SHAFTesbury avenue and the top of the shaft thrusting through the heart of soho ending with the bell end marking the yahoo! european headquarters. The brazilian tuft is where i started the route. I tried to walk around the piss hole in a spacious area around the back of the yahoo! offices but sadly this was not picked up so well with the GPS. :(

    PS. This is my first gps cock and it is a little wobbly due to my amateur 'every 1 metre' settings on GPS tracker. Tracked using my new android G2 phone. I'm sure my next cock will look better..

Sunday, 20 September 2009

How to draw a cock on the landscape

It may not be immediately obvious to budding cock-cartographers how best to go about recording their art on a device, ready to submit it here. Here, then, we present some brief guides for various pieces of hardware.


The best app for bringing cock into your life on the iPhone is "Trails". It allows you to monitor where you're walking (ideal for drawing the perfect cock), record waypoints, upload the data to anything you like, import tracks and it's pretty damn accurate. The only downside to it is the fact that you have to pay, however, considering the price is a mere £1.79 it’s not exactly going to put a massive dent in your balance.

To install do the following:
  • Click on the app store button on your iPhone (you should ensure your iPhone is upgraded to the latest software, however it will warn you if you don’t)
  • Search for “trails”
  • Click on Trails GPS Tracker (or whatever it says on your phone)
  • Click on the “buy” button
  • It will ask you for your apple username and password, so enter the details.
  • Click install and it will begin installing the application fairly quickly.
There is no need to sign up for any website.